This Week's Soapbox

The work week has ended, so I have attempted to relax with this month's Elle. A small blurb on a "fashion flashback" sent me into a tizzy thereby prompting this blog. Ten years ago a supermodel of the time, Jodie Kidd, graced the June cover of Elle. Twenty years ago a supermodel icon, Christy Turlington, was the cover. Today's, you ask?? Jessica Biel. I'm gonna save the brief opinion I have about that later in this speech. Let me begin my lobby to save the jobs of models.

Fashion magazines belong to fashion models. Celebrities are not models. They are simply glorified everyday people. I remember when the term supermodel became an official Webster's term. Those girls worked for their money. Christy, Cindy, Linda, Naomi, Claudia and the gang were the founders of the industry's beautiful monopoly concept--Always book the same 5 devastatingly top-notch models for everything. Now, whichever actress or singer has something to promote, whether it's a pop song, a movie, or a dare-I-say shoe line, they land a cover. Actresses originally were just pretty. They had flaws. Nicole Kidman had terribly frizzy hair. Drew Barrymore always had bad roots. Renee Zellweger had super-squinty eyes and mouse hair. Cameron Diaz had severe acne. Julia Roberts had unruly eyebrows and horse teeth. The list goes on.

One could assume the success with digital imaging has created an actress within the actress. These women hop from cover to cover as if they're all in The Devil Wears Prada while they pretend to be models meanwhile some geek airbrushes and re-touches the photos. It's ridiculous how I am subjected to fashion layouts AND an interview with actresses whose movies I'd never dare rent.

Here's a brief and opinionated survey about the last year of Elle covers.
Jessica Biel 5/16/07: Umm, anyone from the now-defunct WB network,--and yes, that WILL have to include the current Mrs. Tom Cruise --should not make the cover of a fashion magazine known for couture.

Mandy Moore 4/17/07: Society has always smirked on the notion of the fashion industry's use of models in their teens, but suddenly it's ok to have Mandy on a cover? Didn't she sing a song about being as sweet as candy??

Rachel McAdams 3/13/07: McWho? McWhy?

Jessica Simpson 2/13/07: How can someone who has absolutely no sense of fashion, NONE, sell a fashion magazine. See below photos, as if I needed proof.

Gwen Stefani 1/16/06: I vaguely remember her idea of accessories including braces and corn rows. Tres chic!

Jennifer Garner 12/12/06: I like this girl, really I do, but my neighbor has more glamour.

Beyoncé 11/8/06: Naomi Campbell and Iman were the ultimate divas of ethnicity, yet they struggled to land covers. Beyoncé is no Iman, so how does she rate!!!

Jessica Alba 910/17/06: She's only good for being a Maxim girl, and that's not a complement.

Drew Barrymore 9/19/06: I've mentioned the roots. There are also the tacky tattoos, the dye jobs, the lisp you can hear from a photo ....
Lindsay Lohan 8/14/06: I am going to be brave here. She is perhaps one of the few children in media history when the world was forgiven for poking fun of her for being rather ugly.

Keira Knightley 7/18/06: I can forgive Elle for displaying Ms. Knightley. Beautiful Brits are a dime a dozen they say.
Hilary Duff 6/20/06: See above note on Mandy Moore.

I guess I want my models back.